Cleaning Out My Closet

There come's a point in most people's lives where you just have had enough of blood sucking, trash talking, negative people in your life! I no longer have time for people that are all about them. I don't have time for people that talk trash about me, I don't have time for negative people. Life is so short. And these types of people obviously have very small and boring lives if they have to resort to this type of behavior.

I decided to make cuts where it is the easiest and less noticeable -- facebook! So I went down my list of "friends". Many of whom I do not consider friends, many who are barely acquaintances. So I deleted people I didn't talk to. Then I deleted people that were negative on facebook and had annoying posts. After cutting off a good 15 people I started to feel a little better. That wasn't so hard.

Then a harder part. Cutting out the blood sucking friend. You know the one that only calls you and asks how you are to cry on your shoulder for hours. You can't get a word in and it just absolutely drains you! Because I don't like confrontation, I had to think hard on how to approach this friend. Drama would ensue if I said I was cutting off our friendship. So I decided to take an easy (read: wussy) way out. Just don't have any contact. When she calls it goes to voicemail. The voicemails are immediately deleted. I have been doing this for a good month now. I was hoping she got the hint, but no such luck yet. I feel sad to end this relationship, but relieved at this same time. I don't feel obligated to speak with her and be her personal therapist for 3 hours!

I lump the trash talking negative people in the same boat. These people I don't necessarily think should be cut out (family members reside among them), but they need to realize that what they are doing is hurting me and our friendship. So from this blog forward, I am going to handle these people differently. The negativity will be met with a positive statement from me. I won't fall into the negative trap. I will tiptoe away from that mess!

Trash talking is a little harder. It happens behind my back and then I hear about it later. And it's oh, so petty. I think with trash talking I have two choices. One to hit it head on, go to the source and address it, or ignore it and let them drown themselves in negative thoughts and evilness.

Cleaning out your closet can be therapeutic!

Gratefulness: I am oh so grateful for my family. They are funny and kind and although we are spread far and wide, we are close as if we lived with eachother.

Coupon Craziness

I have been a sporadic coupon user. If I came across a coupon for a product I used, I would clip it and use it, but for the most part, I didn’t actively seek out coupons or try and match them to the sales. This year I am going to really try and make the most of coupons and sales. My boyfriend and I aren’t name brand whores and normally go with generic—that in itself saves a lot of money. But why go generic when we can use a coupon and double or even triple our savings on a name brand item?

I know the basics of couponing or maybe even a little more than the basics. Use a coupon; get a certain amount off an item. If the item is on-sale even better, even better if the coupon is doubled! From all my research it looks like it’s best to use a coupon on an item that is on sale. Many hard-core couponers let the sales dictate what they buy for the week.

This week I am experimenting and am only going to buy sale items. That may prove a bit difficult if I need something that doesn’t happen to be on sale. I have already started my list and have one free item. Floss is on sale for $1 at Target, I have $1 off coupon. Therefore, my floss is free! Already starting off on the right foot!

Another idea behind getting the best deal is not to stick to one store. I usually have 2-3 stores I go to, but more for convenience purposes than the deals. This week I am shopping for the deals.

There are a gazillion websites out there about couponing or where you can find the best deals. It is like a kid in the candy store! I have about 6 websites that I really like and I have bookmarked them. I let them do the work for me! They will give you the sale item, the coupons, and the final price! Voila! No calculators and long division for me.

I have a good friend who shops very cheaply for her large family of 5 using coupons and following the deals. She purchases the Sunday newspaper with the ads and prints coupons from the Internet. I don’t get the paper and I am not sure if it’s really worth it, if the coupons I get online are the same as the newspaper. So for now I will stick to printing my coupons off the internet. I’ll update my coupon craze later in the week!

Gratefulness Project- I am grateful for sleep. I tend to not get enough of it during the week! On the weekend I relish going to bed and being able to sleep in. And anytime I can get a nap in is even better

In My Defense

This weekend I participated in a self-defense class. It was something I had always wanted to try, but never got around too, I must admit, I am SO glad I did.

I always felt pretty invincible. I heard about women being mugged, raped, kidnapped; but that is what happened to others, not to me. After hearing story after story and learning lesson after lesson - I felt incredibly vulnerable and ashamed that I thought I could never be a victim.

We learned moves that would help us in the event of someone coming up to us while we were seated in our cars. I was amazed at how easy it was to use technique to hurt someone that could completely overpower me. Again and again we practiced these moves so we could recall them in an event where we were being attacked. I started to feel that I may be able to safe myself, should I get in a situation.

What struck me the most about this class was the men teaching it. They were so passionate about empowering women and making sure we could defend ourselves. These men came from military, police enforcement, and martial arts backgrounds. They drilled into us that these men that attacked women were scum bags and we needed to do whatever we could to safe our lives.

I left the class feeling vulnerable and empowered - if that makes any sense. From now on, I will definitely become more aware of my surroundings and be much more on the lookout for something suspicious. It's my job to defend myself.

Gratefulness project- Being the beginning of January and 70 degrees - I am so grateful for nice weather!

A Decade of Missing

10 years ago today, one of the most influential people in my life passed away, my grandma. It was sudden and gut wrenching! I don't believe that I have been the same ever since. She has missed some of the most important moments of my life. I prayed to her for strength during one of the most trying times of my life--something that mirrors her own. I know for the last decade she has been watching me, but it still hurts to have her gone.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of her or wonder what she would think if she were alive. I strive to be at least half the woman she was and I don't think I ever could be that good. After her passing, our family was visited by ladybugs, often at times when we were down or felt like we needed a hug. I will always believe that those ladybugs are from my grandma. It's just her reminder that she is watching out for us. I believe it so much that I had a ladybug tattooed on my ankle.

I am proud to be from the same blood as my grandma. I am so proud to see how ahead of her times she was. What young Catholic woman divorces a cheating spouse and then takes her young son to a place unknown to re-start their lives? When I have a bad day I always think of how worse things must have been for her and yet she was so happy.

My mom says that we all have a bit of grandma in us and I really think we do. Each one of us shares a special trait with her and for that she will always live on through her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

My life has been forever altered because of the death of a great lady, but she will always be remembered by everyone that knew her.

For my gratefulness project: I am grateful for having known someone as wonderful as my grandmother!

January Gym Joiners

January Gym Joiners. Everyone knows who they are, heck – you could even be one of them! As a gym member for many years, I always dread the month of January at the gym. Faces you don’t recognize, extra people taking up “your” equipment, and puzzled looks as they try to figure out just what that machine does. I try not to hate too bad on them. They are TRYING to be healthy. But it always is the same. By the end of January its back to the same people and lots of open equipment.

As I sweated my way through another elliptical workout, I scanned the gym noticing all the January Gym Joiners. They’re easy to spot – they may be doing odd arm swinging motions – somewhere between a stretch and a Jane Fonda workout – or wearing their brand new workout gear complete with fancy headphones and shiny Nikes.

Don’t get me wrong, their intentions are good, but they try too hard and burn themselves out and by February 1^st, they are back on the couch wasting away their gym membership. So January Gym Joiners, here is my advice to you! Don’t expect to look like those who have been going to the gym for years. It takes time and a lot of effort. You won’t be going to the gym 7 days a week period. If you do, you are setting yourself up for burnout and failure. Aim for 3 days a week for the first month – see how it goes. Try new things. If you stick to the treadmill all month, you will be bored and will quit. Don’t be scared to ask how to use the equipment. We old timers will gladly show you how to do it, or the people that work at the gym will. If you go slow and try new things and keep with it, you may make it through January and maybe become a regular, but I think if you are really serious about joining a gym you will do it in any other month but January!

So for my gratefulness project – I am grateful for the snooze button! As my alarm buzzed at 6am I quickly hit the button and snuggled under a mountain of warm blankets for 10 more minutes. Even though I didn’t sleep I allowed my body 10 minutes to come awake and more time to cuddle fuzzy cats! So thank you snooze button!

Ahh 2012!

As I rang in 2012 with a slight buzz and a passionate kiss with my boyfriend, I wondered what 2012 would bring me. 2011 certainly surprised the hell out of me and I am hoping for only good surprises this year.

I do not understand New Year's resolutions. I used to make them, but like most of the population, my resolution had long been forgotten by February 1. So I spent my January 2nd in a funk. My last day off of work (boo!) and I just couldn't pull it together. I felt like I was already failing 2012. I was down, tired, and completely uncertain as to why I wasn't feeling hopeful about the new year.

So to make myself feel better I had to list things I was grateful for, that made me happy. That made me at least get in the shower!

Then I realized 2012 is the year I turn 30, so that made me get back into bed and watch a crappy movie, that I ended up turning off 5 minutes before it was over!

In resolving to not set a resolution, I have decided that I want to add a few more accomplishments to my "before I turn 30" list.

I had to think really long and hard about what I would like to accomplish in the next 4 months. I already have so much I am proud of - owning my first home by age 22, owning my second home by 28, moving 800 miles away from home by myself, living alone, teaching myself how to do a lot of "guy things".

So what is it that I want to attain before turning 30 since I already have done so much? I Googled lists, thought of things I wanted, but none of it seemed enough. Turning 30 is a big deal to me, it's scary and I want to turn that around. So I have decided I want to learn to just be more grateful. I want to be grateful for what I have. I want to be grateful for people. And I want to remember to be grateful for those things on a daily basis. In the mire of everyday crap I often lose sight of how much I have to be grateful for! And I am going to make it public!

For today I am grateful that I have a job! With so many unemployed and struggling, I am so grateful to have a job. Even though I complained when my alarm went off at 6am after almost a two week vacation!