Not a Phoenix Moment

Alone

Swallowing my pride
I admit defeat
(as a Taurus, that's rare!)
Sweaty fingers release you
to another.
Long nights, shadows and booze
my only friends.
Pleas from slurred lips
tears from blurry eyes
shame me.
The mirror is a stranger
skinny woman--sad eyes
too young to be so haunted.
Dawn breaks, angels sing
(at least that's how it felt!)
An epiphany, my old, tired skin
balled up--thrown away
Not a Phoenix moment
(I'll never go down again!)
Flames lick their greedy tongues
on old memories
now dead.
My soul regenerates.
Better than before.
Compassion, patience, true happiness
unknown qualities
exude from me
like beams of light.